The sequence of events that follow a love relationship breakup can be divided into five reasonably distinct stages. Each of the 5 stages of a break up are essential to facilitate the “getting-over-it” process. The length of each phase can vary significantly, and basically depends upon how traumatic your relationship breakup was to you.
Realizing that there are specific adjustment stages that almost all couples go through after a romantic breakup can sometimes help make the pain easier to cope with and, subsequently, aid the healing process. You can learn how to cope with the loss a little more easily if you are aware of what each facet of a relationship breakup recovery involves.
The Five Stages Of A Breakup.
Acknowledge That Your Breakup Is For Real.
In this stage, all that you can really do is acknowledge that the break up is real, without really trying to wrap your head around what is happening. You’ll probably feel all over the place, completely helpless, vulnerable and overwhelmed and that your breakup is engulfing every aspect of your life. But, it is absolutely necessary that you admit to yourself that you have broken up with your partner.
It is also important, when you are in this initial stage, that you think things through in as much detail as you can. You should try to be aware of your feelings and emotions, even if you aren’t able to deal with them right away. Work through your pain, by focusing on proactive things like sports, healthy exercise, doing arts and crafts or involving yourself in any activity that occupies your mind in a positive way. Spending time with family and friends, or anyone you care about, non-romantically, should be high on your agenda.
Let Your Emotions Come To The Surface
Probably the most important of all the 5 stages of a break up is to allow your emotions spill out! Nothing useful can be achieved if you keep your feelings all bottled up inside. Free yourself from your pain much more quickly by opening up and letting things out, rather than pretending to cope and keeping things to yourself. And you don’t have to think like you are losing control simply because you’re letting your emotions explode. Shedding some tears and pouring your frustrations out can be very theraputic. So, go ahead and let your anger, disappointment, sense of loss or whatever you’re feeling come to the surface during this stage.
Allowing Others To Share Your Pain.
This is the stage where you allow other people to help you with the healing process by offering their own brand of comfort. Spend time with the people who you care about most. Allow them to offer their perspective, and give them a chance to nurture you.
However, a word of caution! Very often your loved ones and close friends, quite unintentionally, can hamper your process of recovery, or set your progress back. You should be aware, that they too are hurting because you’re hurting. Their loving care, at this stage of your recovery from the break up, should be positive and encouraging, not vengeful or anger-driven at your former lover. If this does happen, you need to ask them to refrain from this type of attitude. You will heal from your pain much faster by avoiding the negative contacts and comments.
Sometimes referred to as the “fun” stage and, most likely, the best of the 5 stages of a breakup. You have been suffering from the anguish of recovering from your relationship demise, and now is the perfect opportunity to compensate yourself for it. Don’t look for ‘pay-back’ against your ex-lover, but satisfy yourself by making yourself feel and look better than ever before. It’s not about seeking revenge, but rather about rewarding yourself in positive and healthful ways. Let this break up be the beginning of a new and improved you!
The ‘Moving-On-With-Your-Life‘ Stage.
This is where you can finally begin to look at the bigger picture. Accept the situation for what it’s worth, and move on with your life. It is when you can see why the break up occurred, realize who was responsible for what and why, and determine what you’ve learned from the whole process.
One of the reasons for the breakup can be dirty pick up lines to say to a guy. It will make the interest loss in the relationship. There should be avoidance of the dirty pick up lines in the friendship or relation. When it is realized, it has been too late. So, the communication should be done with fully attentive mind.
When you reach this point of the 5 stages of a breakup, you are no longer worried about the other person, or what they are doing or thinking. You can look at the entire episode as something that happened in the past, and move beyond it.